hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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