You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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