There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Randomize
