they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
