Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
