I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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