:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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