its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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