If that was your dad, he is hot
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
