he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Randomize
