i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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