Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Randomize
