haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
