Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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