i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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