3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
worst night to have a conscience
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
