i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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