I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
