Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
