puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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