I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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