U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
