Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
