fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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