problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
