perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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