i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
