Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
