I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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