i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
