woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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