We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
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