we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
