I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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