Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
