i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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