I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
