Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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