thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize
