i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
