I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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