Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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