But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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