HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Come back. Shots need mouths.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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