so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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