Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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