quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
