Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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