Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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