new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize